Finding joy in his every day seems to be part of my great-grandson Haven’s innate nature. He is a little boy who spreads love and joy wherever he goes.
Finding the joy in my every day life is something I’ve committed myself to over the past few years. I admit I’m not always successful. I don’t always like the things that pop up in my day – and sometimes the whole day appears to start miserably! Where’s the joy in that? And it’s been particularly hard the last few weeks.
Splitting headache, double vision that’s got a whole lot worse. I ended in the Emergency Department where the diagnosis was blood pressure was too high. Recommendation is to double my BP medication, see my GP, and come back if it’s worse. I left with pain killers – codeine being one which made me through up. I saw the ophthalmologist who agreed the blood pressure might be the cause of the worsening double vision and recommended seeing my optometrist. I’ve made an appointment to see her on the 16th. I’m seeing my GP on 12th.
When I’m challenged beyond my comfort zone, it’s particularly hard to find the joy. And this has been a challenging time. I’m grateful to see that throughout this time, I’ve still been committed to finding the joy. Here’s some of the things I noted.
- Every single person I’ve seen over this little journey has been caring, helpful, insightful, dedicated. I even got a few hugs along the way. Always a spirits lifter for me!
- My darling husband is quietly attentive and willing to drive me where I need to go. And lots of hugs there too. Definitely helpful in relieving the stress.
- My dear neighbour popped over and gave me a beautiful head massage. I felt the tension disappear.
I notice too that past stressful times pop into my head and remind me that joy doesn’t have a hard time finding me.
Many years ago I took a market research job that entailed knocking on doors to interview residents of a certain age about a range of products or issues.
I always found the first call of the day excruciatingly difficult. One such day I walked up and down the footpath of my allotted street waiting for the butterflies to settle and the courage to burst forth, getting more and more agitated.
As I walked, I saw a blackbird pecking in the grass on the verge, it suddenly grabbed an earthworm in its beak and my heart filled with joy. Seeing ‘the early bird gets the worm’ in action gave me the impetus to spring into action and knock on that first door. I was the early bird! I would get my quota of interviews and get home early too.
One of the most interesting things about these sorts of experiences is they tend to be easy to call to mind to motivate me in circumstances where I am stuck. Or simply to remind me of what joy feels like. I’ve recalled this “seeing the early bird getting the worm” feeling often over the years.
In response to the well meaning query, “How’s your day going?” you’ve probably heard this response, “Every day above ground is a good day”. I used to think of it as an attempt at humour. But after some deliberation, I’ve come to the conclusion that it is an attempt to lighten a stress the speaker may be feeling.
Try it next time you’re tempted to go into a tale of misery as a response and see if your spirits aren’t lifted a bit, if you don’t even get to feel a glimmer of joy.
Of course there are times when joy finds you! Like the little blackbird. And like on 26th April at the Ages of Pages Book Fair here in my hometown when my two-year-old great-grandson Haven ran up and gave me a loving, joyful embrace. To be recognised with such love and joy prompts a healing response! You might think that he saves this type of welcome for people in his life (like me). But, as I said above, Haven is a little boy who spreads love and joy wherever he goes. He turned from me to the woman beside me and welcomed her in the same way. His loving nature warms my heart.
As I type this, I’m grateful for such a soul in my life. He exemplifies joy and reminds me that it’s simple to feel joy, and spread that joy to others.
I’m seeing that as the sole purpose of our lives. Oh, and I’m feeling a lot better, thank you! Grateful nothing horrific is going on in my body and that the healing is happening.
Other challenges
Along the lines of the Swedish Death Cleaning I wrote about lately, I’ve been thinking of putting all my electronic affairs into order. It would be lovely, I’m thinking, to keep my website going for a while after the physical me is gone. Maintaining a website is expensive. Too expensive to expect my family to pay.
So I’m making the move to a different platform. I’m hoping the move will be seamless.
Thank you for being in my life. I am grateful to each of you who read, pass this on, and write to me. It is to you that I write.
With love – Stephanie
Stephanie Hammond Author 