How old am I? Am I as old as I feel?
Or am I as old as my numbers say?

Dear Reader

Age – is it just a number? Is 70 really the new 50? Are you as old as you feel? I honestly don’t think about age very much, at least not in the way I think I would if I thought I am “getting old”.

But something happened the other day to make me think.

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My Friend IS 80

The other day, as I waited for my husband to finish his gym class, my friend came out, looking a bit ‘done in’. “Hard class, was it?” I asked her.

“Yes! I’m going to have to slow down I think. I’m 80 you know!” She laughed but I didn’t. As she turned to go down the stairs I felt a shockwave of memories flood through my body – challenging my concept of my own mortality.

Memory 1

Years ago I took my baby ‘home’ to Australia for a holiday. Here we visited the older generation, on my dad’s side. 12 of us sat around the lunch table. I was 36, my baby 12 months old. Everyone else was 60 or older. The conversation somehow turned to how old we felt. The adult consensus, me included, was “I don’t feel older than 25!” Made me think!

Memory 2

A few years before we moved to New Zealand (that’s a story for another time!) we were blessed to have my father-in-law live with us. Although he was less than 50 at the time, he had experienced several strokes and was barely able to feed and dress himself. His memory for details wasn’t the best. One day he asked how old he was. When we told him, he asked; “Am I? Am I really that old?” He was incredulous. It still amazes me to think that within his broken body lived a strong and youthful spirit of a man. Made me think!

Memory 3

During my planning consultancy, I worked for a man whose mother hosted our business meetings. She was extraordinary. Nothing was too much trouble whether it was cooking us a treat, making beds for late night stayers, running to the store for supplies. A real ball of energy. But what stays with me the most is her often saying: “I’ll be 80 in a minute!” in the most incredulous tone. Made me think!

And So to Today

Now, I’ve come full circle – my friend from the gym IS 80. And all of a sudden I feel that “I’ll be 80 in a minute!” These memories jolted me out of my complacent enjoyment of myself in my 70s. Feeling the excitement of learning, of putting energy into my writing career, of feeling the strength and increasing flexibility of my body, of feeling invincible or at least like I did in those earlier photos of me, I felt sure I would enjoy life till I’m 140 years old (so much I want to do and see!) Now, I hear myself say to that ‘me’ who lives by the numbers: “Hang on a minute, Stephanie! Don’t you know we’ll be 80 in a minute?”

Yes, time flies – not obvious during each day perhaps. But the months and years do seem to fly by. “Time flies when you’re having fun!” And I admit it. I’m having fun! I love my life. At the end of each day I love to reflect on the joyous moments the day has brought. Now though, I look back at my former client’s mother’s words and I understand what she was saying.

Not this next minute – but it’s true for me too: I’ll be 80 one of these minutes – and that time isn’t too far away!

What about you? How old do you feel?

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AN ADDICT IN THE FAMILY – A MOTHER’S TALE OF HEARTBREAK, COURAGE, AND RESILIENCE

​You can order a copy from Amazon here​

Have any questions? Email me at Stephanie@StephanieHammondAuthor.com