Dear Reader

Why “C” Words?

I was asked why I choose words starting with C. It’s made me reflect on events of the past few years and brought in floods of gratitude for members of the Whanau Group who engulfed me with their love and taught me how to get back in touch with the important things of life.

I’m a resilient person, I admit that now. Looking back over the past 70+ years I can see times when that resilience developed – from my early childhood. In later years, I’ve faced many challenges that called that resilience into question. None challenged me more than to stand beside my youngest son as he faced the consequences of his drug addiction and dealing.

The Whanau Group was set up by CareNZ to support those who have family members suffering from substance addiction. As a group going through similar experiences, we share our lived experiences and offer loving support to each other. The group is facilitated by a practitioner who also has lived experience with addiction.

In the Whanau Group, one of the first things I learned was a new approach to the situation my son was in. New to me, that is. At first we talked about the Three “C”s

– I am not the Cause of his addiction
– I am not the Cure for whatever prompted his turning to substance use
– Without self Care, I am of no use to my son, or to any of my other family members, or to anyone, or to myself.

The Whanau Group is a place where I am safe to express my own fears, weaknesses, faults. I learned to laugh again. And over and over we came back to the Three “C”s. I began to love the Letter C and to add more words to help me cope with the new experiences.

The “C” Words I share with you all have the aim of lightening our load. They shine a light more clearly on the path we tread in our desire to live a happier and more fulfilled life. And in our desire to be of service to others and to find purpose in our lives.
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“C” Word for today is Children

I seem to be surrounded by children lately – physically and in my thoughts. We are blessed to live next door to Amelia, Ziah and Zahria. Their happy sounds make us both smile and to hear their calls of “hello” bring us joy. Olivia at our local cafe is likewise a joy. And as we walk past schools and playgrounds and early childhood centres on our walks, we smile at the happy sounds of children playing.

I’m reminded of my own happy childhood and memories flood in of fun with my cousins Daphne and Barbara and the twins who lived next door to us. Carefree days.

We also walk past retirement villages on our walks. I know this type of living may be in my future but for now I’m grateful that we live in a neighbourhood of mixed age groups where we are reminded to be young. I remember what it was like to be a child – and try to recapture that confidence, trust and sense of fun. It will serve me well in the years to come, I’m sure!

Children are precious. For me, it doesn’t matter that I may not see my grandchildren and their children very often. Memories of our last get together are bright in my heart and mind and I catch myself smiling at something the little ones did or said and it brings the experience back afresh.

Children grow up and my adult children bring me as much joy as they did when they were young – as do the adult grandchildren. I am truly blessed by the children in my life!

They all challenge me to be the best I can be, without even knowing they do. Because of them, I want to live a long life. Not just a life of breathing. A life of LIVING – living well, excited to be learning, interested in the world and all its changes. A life of physical ability as well as mental acuity. I am excited that I can get up off the floor more easily now. I am gardening, enjoying the standard roses we’ve just planted, and the changes in our vegie patches. And although we’ve lost our first three attempts at growing a passionfruit vine, we are planning where and how to make our next attempt. And this week I’m planting 40 daffodils to bloom alongside our lovely tulips when they come up. They will give me something to share in the late winter, early spring. And I’ll enjoy the view from my office window.

Here’s today’s view. The mulch beneath the tree is where the daffodils will go. And the rose bush on the left is one we planted this weekend. She smells delicious and is called Hokey Pokey – the name of a favourite New Zealand ice-cream!

Do you have a favourite C word (or any word) you’d like to share?

I’d love to hear and, if you agree, I’ll share it here in the newsletter.

An Event Reminder
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Ages of Pages
27th April 2024
Claudelands Event Centre
Hamilton, NZ

This is an amazing event that I’m thrilled to participate in this year. I’ll be sharing a table with Pat Backley, who’s books I adore.

The event is billed as: a book event where readers can meet over 70 authors, buy books, and have them signed in person. Multiple genres, from NZ and Australian authors. All ages welcome. Free entry.

Facebook page for the event is: https://www.facebook.com/groups/agesofpagesfans​

My thoughts for Living Life in 2024 and beyond:

“Write it on my heart that every day is
the best day of the year”

Ralph Waldo Emerson

“Remember that sometimes not getting
what you want is a wonderful stroke of luck”
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Dalai Lama

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